How Granny Panties Will Ruin Your Marriage

It started off as an accident….. that has turned deadly.

I needed new underwear.

My ass kept getting fatter and with that my underwear were becoming increasingly snug.

I knew it was time for some new panties.

I had bought some boy shorts for sleepy time long ago from Walmart…yes I do buy Walmart undies.

They were perfect. Just the right amount of coverage to be comfortable and just the right amount of booty cheeks to be sexy.

I had never found any like it since.

I had not bought Walmart undies in years but I thought I would go back and see if they still had these No Boundary booty shorts.

I thought I had found the right ones until I got home and I put them on.


Not At All.

Not Even Close.

These were called “Hipsters” so I figured they sit on your hips? I don’t know.

These underwear, do not deserve to be called panties. They are full-blown underwear. Like up to your belly button, cover your whole ass and a half underwear.

But I fell in love with them.

I Can’t Lie. They were so comfortable. It was like I wasn’t even wearing anything but I felt cozy and secure.

But how can such undies be deadly you may ask?

Deadly to my sex life that’s what!

Any time I put them on, Steven thinks I’m sending him a message:

“Not Tonight”


“Stay Back 50 Feet”

Don’t know where this came from, tell me and I’ll gladly credit it.

But that is not at all what I mean!

I never imagined I would be one to wear granny panties! But here I am….

They secretly slipped into my life and I will not get rid of them. I tried to make them sexy for him by giving myself a wedgie temporarily.

That didn’t work.

What has happened to me? Its a year into marriage and its all down hill already?

This is not me! This is not what I signed up for or what HE signed up for.

Lets hope we can just chalk this up to the pregnancy.

All will be sexy and smooth after the baby comes right? I will shave my legs more, feel sexy in my “panties” again and all will be well, right?


Ok ok here’s the deal….I’ll give it 6 months after the baby is born and burn them. Well have a party, drink some wine, and “celebrate” ??

January 2021 they will be out of our lives forever! PROMISE!

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2 years ago

No they won’t. They are here to stay!!!!